Friday, August 22, 2008

Things not to do as a mother


What kind of example is this for your kids?
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9 comments:

IIICard said...

So are we to believe that when we become mothers, we are expected to stop enjoying our lives? Are we all required to gain a hundred-plus pounds, and sit at home continuing to squeeze out several more children (probably by multiple men)? I must disagree. As long as the mother ensures that the child is loved and well-cared for a woman can, and should, enjoy herself. Look at all the extremely successful, professional, beautiful mothers whom we all admire: Garcelle Beauvais, Angelina Jolie, Jennifer Lopez, Solange, Halle Berry, Mo'Nique, and, for that matter, certainly Beyonce will be a mother before too long, as well. Oh, and don't want to forget...me. And my son says "Fuck you BITCHES!!!"

August 22, 2008 at 10:05 PM
Anonymous said...

What king of response was that?

Women with children (Mother's) certainly should not stop enjoying their lives, but there is a fine line of what is appropriate, and what clearly isn't. Part of being a parent is guiding & teaching. Your child, first, learns from what they see in the home. Setting standards (good or bad) for them to grow with, shapes them as a person. Do you actually believe that, that photo is something a child should see & think, is appropriate for Mommy/Women to do in their spare time? If so, maybe you should reevaluate your own morals. I've seen pictures of her half-naked, taking "sexy" shots....with her child IN THE SAME ROOM! What kind of "Mother" is that??? Certainly not the likes of anyone you named as "successful, professional, beautiful mothers whom we all admire". How dare you even put her and them in the same paragraph!? SMH...We've got to do BETTER.
Oh yeah & P.S.: Having your son say "Fuck you BITCHES!!!", is a prime example of why you probably should have swallowed it! :)

August 23, 2008 at 1:01 AM
Anonymous said...

she aint even cute haha why u mad?

August 24, 2008 at 12:56 PM
IIICard said...

You may want to try to develop a sense of what "sarcasm" is. Do you really think my son actually said that? Do you think I told him people are talking about his mother, so he said that? You idiots have a lot to learn. No, he doesn't know anything about this slander & libel being inflicted upon his mom. I would just rather read a book with him. (Excuse me, Mother Teresa, isn't that what I'm SUPPOSED to do?) You write somewhat articulately; better, in fact, than the original mysterious "blogger," but you apparently went back for a second and third helping of self-righteousness and skipped right past the sense of humor AND the common-sense lines.

Now, allow me to address your response to MY response:

I, and for that matter, my family and friends (the people who matter to me) think that photo is hot. Although it is nobody else's business, I WILL explain that that is a shot of me after a show when I was performing in a rock band. At the time, my son was safely tucked in his bed, at home, in the care of his father. I am hesitant to explain even THAT much, but since you are all in my business, I will say that those are MY memories and I wouldn't change them for anything in the world. Certainly not for a lowlife who doesn't know me nor what I stand for. If you don't like my photos, don't look at them; there are millions of PUBLIC figures for you to look at on the internet. Who are YOU to judge ME? Who are you to comment on my morals and qualifications as a mother when, again, you don't know me. You are looking at photos of me from MY MySpace page. I believe that is intended to be a site for people to express themselves in a creative way. It isn't supposed to be a place for others to STEAL images for their own perverse, trouble-making pleasure. You make it seem like I was prancing around in sexy lingerie in front of my son. You make it sound like I had my legs all open with a flashlight shining down on my exposed pussy with my son standing there with a sign reading "Look at my mother's pussy." I was in a t-shirt and underwear. If it is inappropriate to you for a child to see his or her parents in their underwear, I guess the entire world is wrong. I suppose we, as parents, are required to be covered from head-to-toe at all times. Get real and GET A LIFE!!! I believe this is the United States of America and we are free to live as we choose as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. How are my pictures affecting you?

I'm very sorry that you have such low self-esteem and self-worth that you feel the need to judge others to make yourself feel better. I believe the Man upstairs said to leave that in His hands. You have probably never set foot in a church in your life, or you would know not to judge others. However, I will say that the biggest difference between you and me is that I don't try to push my morals on anyone else, EXCEPT my son. For your information, again, since you want to be all up in my business, I am VERY conscious to ensure that he is not exposed to things that I consider inappropriate and that he has POSITIVE influences and examples in his life.

You asked how I can put those other women in the same paragraph. Well, Halle Berry is a great woman who has done many things in her life, but I will never think of myself as a lesser woman because of her fame. Remember that explicit sex scene she did in "Monster's Ball?" Did that mean she should not have become a mother, as her child may someday see it and think less of her? Or how about Garcelle Beauvais from "The Jamie Foxx Show" doing a fully nude pictorial in "Playboy?" Does that make her a bad mother? I don't think so, but it is not for me to judge. Nor do I give a fuck. That is her business; not mine. And, oh by the way, they were fully nude, and out there for the whole world to see. I had clothes on, on my own MySpace page. So you need to take your complaint up with whoever is running this bullshit blog.

In closing, I say you should mind your own business, you live longer. You got a lot to learn; maybe YOUR mother should have swallowed!

PS: I love my haters; you make me famous. Keep 'em coming, "Gay-son" aka "a group of oversized, lonely, pillow-hugging bitches!!" Ha, ha.

August 24, 2008 at 5:25 PM
Anonymous said...

First, I must say that I honestly do not believe that "iiicard" is actually 'Tanaya' herself. That has to be a ghostwriter or something! But I will respond anyway.

Of course I did not actually think that your son said that. Hence the expression "Having(key word) your son say...". I would only hope a boy of that age doesn't speak in that manner...already.

Although I agree that stealing a person's personal pictures from their 'MySpace' page is wrong, it should be anticipated. It really isn't any of our business what you do in your life. But, when you decide to share your pictures in any public outlet, for thousands to see, people; obviously, are going to look & comment-if they choose to. That was your choice....embrace what comes with it.

You're right about one thing. I don't know you. I can only comment on what I see. That's where it gets complexed. Perception is a hell of a thing. And while you may know the background on the situation...other's don't. Not to say that you need to explain anything to anybody. You just shouldn't get mad when other's DO state their opinions. Plain & simple.

From what I saw, you had on laced panties. It pretty much was lingerie. If that's normal for you & your family then, hey, what can I say?

What those actresses have done in/for their career doesn't parallel to your acts, in the least bit. They were acting & posing in good taste IMO. You on the other hand, were "dropping it like it's hot, with your legs cocked" in what looked to be a parking lot. BIG DIFFERENCE! BTW, pointing out what other's have done, doesn't make what you're doing any more acceptable. It just makes you look like, maybe, you are somewhat ashamed...and looking for a scapegoat.

I never once judged you. I'm just saying that maybe you should think a little harder about what you do and how you present yourself. And please don't say you: "don't care about what people think of you", yada yada. Because if you didn't, we wouldn't be having this dialect in the first place. I'm not trying to push my beliefs on you...only words of advice.

Once again, I did not make this blog nor steal your photos...I just simply commented. I apologize if I came across offensive or judgmental. I just dislike to see our black women portrayed in a negative light. And that picture did not help. You ask, how are your pictures "affecting" myself? Well, it effect's us all, on how we're being viewed as a culture.

The bottom line is: You're going to do what you please, regardless. Whatever makes you happy and fulfilled, by all means, continue on with it. Just be prepared & don't take any pessimism/backlash to heart. After all we're only "hater's", right?! ;)

August 24, 2008 at 8:42 PM
Anonymous said...

OMG GIVE ME A BRAKE IF SHE WANT TO TAKE A PIC SHE CAN NOW FREEEEEE08 ITS LIKE YOUR A BIG HATER.I HAVE BEEN WATCHING THESE COMMENTS FOR DAYS AND WHY ARE U TRYING PROVE A POINT WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.HAVE THIS GIRL TOOK A BOY FRIEND BACAUSE YOUR KEEPIN A WATCH ON THIS STORY? HAS SHE GOT UNDER YOUR SKIN BEFOR? BECAUSE FOR U NOT 2 KNOW HER LIKE U SAY SHES SURE ON YOUR MIND? IF SHE DOES HAVE A GHOSTWRITTER ALL THESE RAP STARS DO WHY CANT SHE...LOL...PLZ GET A LIFE IT SEEMS WHAT EVER SHE SAY YOU HAVE A COME BACK SHUT UP AND FIND A SOMETHING 2 DO THIS IS JUST SAD THAT SHIT WAS LONG AND WHY? TANAYA I DONT KNOW WHAT U DID 2 HER BUT SHE HATES U.....LOL..ONE MORE THING WHY ARE YOU TRYING 2 SAY YOUR NOT THE BLOGGER THAT MAKES ME THINK YOU ARE? THINK ABOUT IT PEOPLE. U NEED TO PUT YOUR HANDS ON A REMOTE AND OFF THAT COMPUTER BECAUSE THIS IS BECOMING SAD MISS NEED TO PROVE YOUR POINT FOR NO REASON. GO 2 THE CLUB OR SOMETHING.OK PEOPLE THATS SEE WHAT SHE COMES UP WITH NEXT.......LOL

August 24, 2008 at 10:32 PM
IIICard said...

Wow, freeeeeed08, you're back so soon? It sure seems like you must know me, and that I have made you angry in the past, since you have such strong opinions of me and are so sure I'm using a ghostwriter. What exactly do you think of my level of education? Why do you assume that I can't express myself well? And while you're making assumptions about MY literacy, I noticed a couple of errors in YOUR comments. Tell me, what does "complexed" mean?

Why do you single out "our black women?" Aren't there all races on MySpace doing sexy poses? Mine weren't all that provocative anyway. And that makes me wonder; since you're so concerned with "how we're being viewed as a culture," which culture would that be? I don't know too many other black women who are in rock 'n' roll bands.

I DO care what my family and friends think of me, ass-face. That is why I spoke up for myself in the first place. But I am not ashamed of any of my photos, and that is why all those pix you love so much are still up on my page along with the Playboy bunnies and Trina's song. In the end, I don't give a fuck what other people think. My standing up for myself and actually caring what you think are two different things. Don't get it twisted; I can only be me, my friend.

If you are so for our community and people, why don't you start some kind of girl club and stop wasting your time trying to make me feel bad about myself. This is getting scary. You really need to get a life, like my anonymous supporter said, and stay out of mine, because you are really beginning to sound like a stalker who loves them some Tanaya...LOL.
You obviously found my MySpace page; do you know where I live, too? Do you like the way my house looks; I know it's cute. I mean, really, you clearly studied the pictures of me in my underwear. Maybe you're not a hater, after all. Maybe you're a fan.

August 25, 2008 at 12:12 AM
Anonymous said...

I find it very amusing that, now, you try to attack my character! You have no premise whatsoever. I mean really, is name calling at this point even necessary? Those are signs of defeat. As I already apologized for any misunderstanding & even explained reasoning behind my comments...you still insist going on with this tirade. Tsk tsk. I thought you "didn't care"? You already explained your stance twice...so what part of the game is this?

To go on to deem somebody a "hater", simply because they voice their opinion, that doesn't flatter you...they have to be "hating". That's rather ridiculous. You should try thinking outside the box for once.

I can assure you that I DO NOT know you. Trust me! Stalking? I happen to come across your 'MySpace' page & recognized the person. Studying photos? I am a great observer, and it's not hard to look at something and gain information. To clarify, I've ONLY expressed strong opinions on what I've seen; i.e. your photos. Show me where I have said anything regarding information that couldn't possibly be gathered from the internet. I only stated that I do not believe that is you typing, because of, again: The way you present yourself. Sure I probably boxed you in a stereotype...excuse me, that's what happens sometimes.

I singled out "our black women", because that is the topic of discussion. Yourself. You are not a male (I hope). You are not White, Asian or Hispanic, right? So why would I bring up something irrelevant to the conversation? With that said...isn't it apparent which culture I speak of?

As for your "supporter": For someone who can't spell correctly (Didn't you see all the red underlines on your text before you submitted?) ; or even produce a proper sentence....you sure have a lot to say about a situation that doesn't concern you either. Don't you think!? How can you denounce what I'm doing, while you are doing the same exact thing? The only difference is, you're Pro and I'm Con. "Get a life", you say? A little contradicting of yourself, when you admit to keeping a lookout of this particular blog entry too. =/ Next time you feel you have something you want people to read, PLEASE use Microsoft Word. It can assist you with your many errors.

Also "Tanaya", you may want to look for the word "complexed" in any dictionary. It is another way of saying complicated!

My responses may be lengthy, mainly because I know how to articulate my words. And of course if someone is speaking to me, it is only courteous to answer the things they said. Don't get it misconstrued. I am simply a frequent reader of this blog, and it is only natural to check for a response to something I said; as you did yourself.
I never was trying to make you feel bad about yourself, Tanaya.

August 25, 2008 at 9:13 PM
Anonymous said...

I nearly forgot about this topic…but, here I am. Not only for the youth of tomorrow, but for the Men & Women who have struggled to achieve greatness for our culture, and refuse to be denigrated to this poor example having been displayed. We will not be set back any longer! This will, unfortunately, be my final reflection about this sad situation.

My parting words for “Ms. Tanaya”:
Was it eating away at you that much regarding my identity, you had to “make up” a description for me?? It’s just very odd that you would use an actual person to mark me as. Because after entertaining your theory for a moment…I realized who you were truly ranting about. I am terribly sorry, but I am NOT who you think I am. That shows you're thinking about that person a little more than you'd probably like to admit. I mean, I don't know how many "hater's" you have...but of all people, why choose to speak up that particular person? Now that seems weird. Any who....I am honestly telling you that...YOU DO NOT KNOW ME, AND I DO NOT KNOW YOU. Pasadena is a relatively small city....I hear/know about a lot of people I've never met. You just happen to be one of them. Is it my fault your name is out there?

I must applaud you. You managed to successfully find an error of mines. Kudos! Although, I insist that ‘Complexed’ is correct as it stands. It is as simple as adding an "ed" (for tense purposes), to the word COMPLEX--that again, you will find in your household Webster's Dictionary. What's so hard about that?

This conversation was pretty much futile after my initial reply. The reason for my extended exchange was to give you the benefit of the doubt, that perhaps you would open your eyes to understand the world before you. That, I could help in some way. But your comprehension skills are minute. And your theories are completely asinine. Maybe you’ll never get it. Sometimes you demonstrate to have the capability to think…you should try using your noggin more often. It goes without saying that I am not alone in my opinion. Obviously the reason this blog was created in the first place. You’re a target. You will always be as long as you allow yourself. It’s truly sad if you don’t realize that by now. Mommy should have taught you better. I see it’s a cycle. :( Maybe she should have swallowed.

Goodbye & Good luck.
Freeeeeeee08 :)

September 3, 2008 at 4:07 PM

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